Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Sickness!

I'm going to need more N-95 respirators...

Everyone around me is sick... classmates, labmates, friends, roommates. I suppose it doesn't help that most of these sick people inhabit the overlap of these categories in my Venn-diagram of life.

Word on the public health street is that its a new round of rhinovirus, otherwise known as the dreaded 'common cold'. The sad irony of being an infectious disease student is that despite your rather impressive knowledge of infectious microbes, there's often very little you can to do avoid the more ubiquitous ones without resorting to some extreme measures.

Yes, I used the word ubiquitous. Look it up.

I've been lucky enough to avoid getting sick since I moved to California in August. I feel as though that's a fairly impressive feat, all things considered... go ahead, consider those things, those of you who know me. Now, what can I do to avoid catching this latest round of respiratory infections? I've outlined my options below.
  1. Use of personal protective equipment, including latex gloves, lab coat or surgical gown, N-95 mask, and goggles. Perhaps a full-body Tyvek suit would be in order. Reference Eduardo's picture for an idea of what I might look like.
  2. Move to Canada. I hear they have universal health coverage there.
  3. Inject myself with large doses of mucosal IgA antibody. And Scotch.
  4. Remove all ICAM-1 receptors in my respiratory epithelial cells. That's where the virus gets ya.
  5. Sleep well, drink plenty of fluids, eat healthy and wash hands often.
  6. Hide.
Speaking of getting sick, watch out for Pringles, your two most favorite flavors may be contaminated with salmonella... thats right, 'Cheeseburger' and 'Taco Night'. Guess you'll have to stick to 'Sour Cream & Onion' for a while.

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